The scene faded from black to show the crystal clear blue water of a pool of olympic proportions. Small waves and splashing all over the water as someone swam across the pool swiftly... He reached the end of the pool and walked up the steps, water dripping from his tanned and toned pecs, his broad shoulders and his black hair through which he ran his hands over. A woman in a white trikini and an hourglass figure handed him a golden towel, which matched with his golden swimming trunks.
If by now you hadn't noticed who am I talking about you're really slow... Alberto del Rio grabbed the towel, not even acknowledging the woman, after all she was one of his multiple servants. Alberto dried his body off and smirked into the camera, wrapping his towel around his lower body, spreading his arms wide for the camera, a cocky, pompous smirk on his face.
Alberto del Rio: Ahhh... Welcome! My name is Alberto del Rio, and this is my "Humilde morada" or humble abode if your neurones can't process Spanish.
The identity of the man holding the camera was evident as he shouted out.
Ricardo Rodriguez: Gringos pendejos! (Stupid gringos).
Alberto del Rio: Pointing out the obvious, my dear Ricardo... I'm glad you spoke out loud, so the people at home know that no underserving people are welcome at my place. You see, the reason I decided to put this small video together was because quite frankly I am a bit tired...
Alberto walked away from the pool and took a seat on a nearby golden chair he had by the pool, throwing his feet up on top of a golden table.
Alberto del Rio: I am tired of so many things in the EBWF. I am tired of taking a backseat to pinches pendejos like The Miz, AJ Styles, Trent Barreta, CM Punk... AND NOW I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH IDIOTS LIKE HOGAN AND KEVIN NASH? Esa es la gota que derramó el vaso! (That was the drop of water that made the glass spill)
Alberto clearly looked upset as he crossed his feet, still resting them over the table. Another female servant approached him with a golden platter and a golden plate, full of mexican soup... She began spooning it to the mexican aristocrat slowly, wiping his lips after each spoon of the mexican platter.
Alberto del Rio: I am sick. I am tired of the way this place is being run... Like a circus! Like a feria! QUE PORQUERIA! (What a Shitload of nonsense!)
Alberto dismissed the soup and the servant, before pointing at the camera, his feet off the table now.
Alberto del Rio: I... Have wrestling on my veins! My father... My uncle... They helped built the ART you gringos mugrosos watch on monday nights while you clog on hamburgers and chicken wings! The least I deserve is to be recognised as an artist, an innovator, a celebrity, a LEGEND and ultimately... A CHAMPION! You see... Alberto del Rio is an honest, intelligent man who learns from his mistakes. When I arrived to the EBWF I wanted to be in the center of the spotlight... I wanted to be the main guy or as you gringos culones, barrosos (fat-assed, acné-cramped gringos) who still live with your mother say... The biggest draw on every show.
Alberto's face allowed a slight chuckle to escape his otherwise serious facial expression.
Alberto del Rio: Its no mystery I have what it takes to be on top of the world... I have the talent, I have the charisma, the wealth, did I mention the talent? I have it all! But I have allowed things to distract me from the real goal... The canvas, the ring, WRESTLING. I have been used to make you gringos hediondos (stinking) laugh, cry, cheer and boo... I have been obliged to perform like a dancing monkey for your entertainment! The reason why I decided to shoot this from my house was simply because I DESPISE everything about coming to the ring and seeing your stupid, freckled, faces... I DESPISE having to share my important, enlightening transcendental thoughts with you... Peasants! Campesinos! Mugrosos! Asquerosos! (Countrypeople, filthy, disgusting).
Alberto shook his head.
Alberto del Rio: You don't want to come down and hear me speak my mind... You don't want to watch me wrestle, you just want to watch me lose, night after night... Why? Because I am better than each and every single one of you! Because from the moment I walk... Wait, scratch that... From the moment I step out of my LUXURIOUS car I am already delivering a message... To the announce team, to the interviewers, the people in the back, Wes and the fans... I am simply... Better than you! I am a humble man... But you can't hide what is evident... Even to inferior eyes who are only accustomed to watch "The Jersey Shore".
Alberto shrugged, smirking mockingly into the camera.
Alberto del Rio: Another thing I dislike is having to put up with the stupid Interviewers... Idiots that just point out the obvious. Idiots on a payroll... If you are an interviewer... I suggest you stay THE F#CK out of my way! Es un consejo amistoso(As a friendly advice!).
Alberto threw his trademark wink at the camera.
Alberto del Rio: As I was saying... If you want to get things done well, do them yourself. But if you want to get things done according to your GREATNESS... Pay someone to do it for you! Ricardo here will be in charge of announcing me, for example... He is also taking a shot at being my cameraman when I'm home... He will address you peasants when it's necessary, although I seriously doubt I ever need to talk to you!
He smirked again, Ricardo was heard cackling behind the camera.
Alberto del Rio: With my mind, my body and my soul focused on what happens between those ropes... I'll need someone to help me out with all the issues regarding my public image...
Ricardo Rodriguez: Oh... Really? You need someone to help you out with your public image? With media appearances, red carpets, bookings? Because I'll be honored to...
Alberto del Rio: Ricardo, Ricardo... I saw your eyes twinkling when I mentioned I needed an assistant... I hate to break it to you, but I had to hire someone who has proven their worth at calling the shots... Someone clinical, someone street smart, someone with a mind for business... Someone whose influence can help me get over the Mizes and Punks out there...
Ricardo Rodriguez: Paul Heyman?
Alberto del Rio: Ese gordo culón? Ni en un millón de años! (That Fat-ass? Not in a million years!) Ricardo, I went out there and went for the best person I could afford... She is in fact right here, ready to introduce herself... Ladies and Gentlemen, undeserving peasants... I give you my personal assistant... Miss Eve Marie Torres...
Alberto clapped as Eve walked into the scene, wearing a golden dress which clung graciously over her tanned shoulders... She reached out and shook hands with Alberto del Rio before sitting across him.
Ricardo Rodriguez: Mamacita!
Alberto reached out and kicked Ricardo, the camera rocked up and down, Ricardo let out a yelp of pain.
Alberto del Rio: Manners Ricardo! My beautiful Eve... Welcome to my place, and welcome aboard!
Eve smiled and nodded.
Eve Torres: Alberto, thank you for having me... I have great news for you.
Alberto del Rio: I'm all ears.
Eve Torres: Alberto, I know you hired me this week and there was little time to work... I also know you're dying to get back in the ring to prove your worth! I also know you are looking for a match against someone who has something to offer... I just had three days, but I am happy to say I got you a match.
Alberto del Rio: Boy, you're efficient! I like where this is going!
Eve Torres: I wish the match I got you were against someone with a lot more history... But he's red hot right now. Ready for the announcement?
Eve giggled, slid her hands along her knees and smiled, seeming genuinely excited about the announcement.
Eve Torres: This monday night... At Warfare... You'll be facing the Path for Glory Championship number one contender... Evan Bourne!
Alberto's facial expression probably resembled a Sphinx when he heard who was he facing... Nevertheless, he was willing to listen to his brand new assistant
Eve Torres: Now, I know what you're thinking! I know he isn't even in your league Alberto... I know you probably think he doesn't hold a candle to someone with your qualities and abilities... I know it might not seem like much, but think about the repercussions of a victory on Monday.
Alberto's facial expression probably resembled a Sphinx when he heard who was he facing... Nevertheless, he was willing to listen to his brand new assistant
Eve Torres: Now, I know what you're thinking! I know he isn't even in your league Alberto... I know you probably think he doesn't hold a candle to someone with your qualities and abilities... I know it might not seem like much, but think about the repercussions of a victory on Monday.
Alberto remained silent, listening to Eve.
Eve Torres: What will te EBWF universe think about Alberto del Rio after he beats...
Alberto del Rio: My lovely lady Eve, I believe the word you are looking for is Destroy!
Alberto winked at her, she smiled and nodded.
Eve Torres: That's more like it! Now we need to get people to turn some heads your way... Alberto. Today your opponent might be a nobody, but if you show how much you deserve it... Imagine where you will end up tomorrow?
Alberto del Rio: My lovely lady Eve, I believe the word you are looking for is Destroy!
Alberto winked at her, she smiled and nodded.
Eve Torres: That's more like it! Now we need to get people to turn some heads your way... Alberto. Today your opponent might be a nobody, but if you show how much you deserve it... Imagine where you will end up tomorrow?
Alberto smiled a little.
Alberto del Rio: You're right Eve... I will take on Evan Bourne on Monday night... And I am going beat him! Like I beat hundreds like him back in my native Mexico... Everyone down there is just a little jumping bean Eve, it is Crazy! Everyone is stinking poor down there... They think that by wrapping a mask around their ugly faces and leaping off the turnbuckles they will get a big fat check and their own comic book... Half of the Wrestlers in Mexico compete so they can put food on their plates at the end of the day... I, on the other hand... Do this because it is in my gene code, because it is what I love to do! I crush small chihuahuas like Evan Bourne for the fun of it...
Alberto's smile turned into a confident smirk.
Eve Torres: That's the spirit Alberto! I know Evan isn't the biggest opponent but...
Alberto cut her off, smiling confidently.
Alberto del Rio: Of course he isn't the biggest opponent! Evan Bourne has been here for quite some time... But we have to face the facts. His match against me is BY FAR the biggest threat he has faced... I hear his record is amazing, but let's be honest: If I had the joke matches he gets I would be undefeated by now! He's red hot right now, he beat two other nobodies to become a number one contender, but he is still to be challenged! And what better opponent to be challenged than me... El más grande de los grandes... el orgullo de México, EL PATRON!!!!! The poor little kid must be shaking in his little boots as we speak!
Eve Torres: You are, without a shadow of a doubt better than him Alberto! That's why I didn't turn down the match! Because big or small... Evan Bourne has something you don't have.
Alberto looked surprised and a tad upset about Eve's comment.
Eve Torres: You know, he's the Number one Contender for the path to glory ti...
Alberto's chuckle cut Eve off before she was able to finish her sentence.
Alberto del Rio: Eve... Eve... Eve! My beautiful Eve! Do I look like I need mediocre championship to make myself look better? To make myself relevant? Look at me Eve. Take a good long, lasting look at me... I've been jerking the curtain for these pinches mediocres since I arrived and yet... They ask me for autographs, pictures, they even ask me for money! Requests which of course are denied every time... Just imagine if I had the chances people like The Miz, Cody Rhodes, Chris Jericho or CM Punk have had! I have been here for several months Eve... Since The Royal Rumble! Yet again that perro Ikeda hasn't thrown me a miserable bone! I don't get him...
Eve Torres: Do you want me to talk to him? Maybe him and I could discuss the benefits of having you as the star of the show...
Alberto smirked and nodded.
Alberto del Rio: I'm pretty sure you can speak some sense into him... After all, who could say no to such an angelical beauty?
Eve smiled in an "I know that" kind of way, running a hand along her caramel colored bangs of hair. Alberto snapped his fingers.
Alberto del Rio: La chequera... ORALE!
Heels clicking really fast were heard approaching the scene as another of his servants handed him a golden platter with a golden pen and a golden checkbook. Alberto uncapped the pen and scribbled down a check to Mr. Wes Ikeda... He signed it and handed it to Eve.
Alberto del Rio: Tell him I would like to make the EBWF a better place... Tell him I will take care of the EBWF... Tell him he could even work for me if he loves to wrestle so much!
Eve looked a little confused.
Alberto del Rio: I want to buy EBWF off from him... He's a businessman, I'm a businessman... We'll negotiate. Tell him that is my first offer.
The camera zoomed in at the check which read "Wesley R. Ikeda" the check's worth however was blank... Eve smiled a little.
Eve Torres: I certainly will Alberto... You don't have to worry about...
Alberto again cut the lovely Eve off.
Alberto del Rio: Worries? Alberto del Rio is a calm... Patient man. Alberto del Rio doesn't worry! Thanks to you Eve I can concentrate on what really makes my heart beat, while you do business on my behalf!
Eve Torres: Alberto, I won't let you down... I promise! As long as you take good care of Evan Bourne...
Alberto del Rio: Mira niña, Evan Bourne will be taken care of... You have my word. And my word is worth its weigh in gold! I get Bourne is a fast, hungry superstar... He's a high flyer... But the higher they fly... The harder they fall after I kick them across the skull! Quick, pesky, molestos... High fliers are a dime a dozen in Mexico... This won't be new for me!
Alberto threw his arms behind his head, as another servant stood next to him to beat some air on his face with a golden fan... His feet returned to the top of the table.
Alberto del Rio: Evan Bourne might think he stands a chance because he has been doing well as of late... He thinks he is on his way to. "The path to glory" Now I'll let you in on a little secret... The path to glory championship is a fraud... And a joke. Being the honest man I am, I feel forced to tell you the truth... There is only one path to glory... And that path consists on the footsteps I leave behind everyday... Whoever invented the Path To Glory should tell Ted DiBiase and Evan Bourne they have been walking in circles for far too long!
A mocking laughter was heard.
Ricardo Rodriguez: Mendigos Burros! (Poor Donkeys!)
Alberto del Rio: Evan, nothing personal against you... You're not even worth of holding a grudge against. As a man of honor, let me give you advice on how to overcome the inevitable fate of losing to me.
He chuckled a little and shrugged.
Alberto del Rio: It is just the type of man I am! Evan, you have been here for months now and you have done nothing to get noticed... A minor title reign which lasted like a week... An unsuccessful attempt at the PTG Championship... I would say your biggest achievement so far was bedding Maria? Although Punk beat you for a couple of years...
Alberto smiled into the camera.
Alberto del Rio: Evan, you are still in time to quit. Stop boring us with your matches, stop making us listen to your irrelevant thoughts, stop trying to impress us with the overly done aerial moves... Burger King, Taco Bell pr McDonald's would be more than happy to have you there... Once I lock the cross armbreaker it will be all over! You'll just have to tap to end the suffering! I'll be merciful if you tap quickly... I could try and NOT break your arm... But you can still flip burgers with your other hand an arm eh? See you on Sunday... PERRO.
Alberto smiled and laid back, Eve clapped as the scene faded to the EBWF.Net logo.
Alberto looked surprised and a tad upset about Eve's comment.
Eve Torres: You know, he's the Number one Contender for the path to glory ti...
Alberto's chuckle cut Eve off before she was able to finish her sentence.
Alberto del Rio: Eve... Eve... Eve! My beautiful Eve! Do I look like I need mediocre championship to make myself look better? To make myself relevant? Look at me Eve. Take a good long, lasting look at me... I've been jerking the curtain for these pinches mediocres since I arrived and yet... They ask me for autographs, pictures, they even ask me for money! Requests which of course are denied every time... Just imagine if I had the chances people like The Miz, Cody Rhodes, Chris Jericho or CM Punk have had! I have been here for several months Eve... Since The Royal Rumble! Yet again that perro Ikeda hasn't thrown me a miserable bone! I don't get him...
Eve Torres: Do you want me to talk to him? Maybe him and I could discuss the benefits of having you as the star of the show...
Alberto smirked and nodded.
Alberto del Rio: I'm pretty sure you can speak some sense into him... After all, who could say no to such an angelical beauty?
Eve smiled in an "I know that" kind of way, running a hand along her caramel colored bangs of hair. Alberto snapped his fingers.
Alberto del Rio: La chequera... ORALE!
Heels clicking really fast were heard approaching the scene as another of his servants handed him a golden platter with a golden pen and a golden checkbook. Alberto uncapped the pen and scribbled down a check to Mr. Wes Ikeda... He signed it and handed it to Eve.
Alberto del Rio: Tell him I would like to make the EBWF a better place... Tell him I will take care of the EBWF... Tell him he could even work for me if he loves to wrestle so much!
Eve looked a little confused.
Alberto del Rio: I want to buy EBWF off from him... He's a businessman, I'm a businessman... We'll negotiate. Tell him that is my first offer.
The camera zoomed in at the check which read "Wesley R. Ikeda" the check's worth however was blank... Eve smiled a little.
Eve Torres: I certainly will Alberto... You don't have to worry about...
Alberto again cut the lovely Eve off.
Alberto del Rio: Worries? Alberto del Rio is a calm... Patient man. Alberto del Rio doesn't worry! Thanks to you Eve I can concentrate on what really makes my heart beat, while you do business on my behalf!
Eve Torres: Alberto, I won't let you down... I promise! As long as you take good care of Evan Bourne...
Alberto del Rio: Mira niña, Evan Bourne will be taken care of... You have my word. And my word is worth its weigh in gold! I get Bourne is a fast, hungry superstar... He's a high flyer... But the higher they fly... The harder they fall after I kick them across the skull! Quick, pesky, molestos... High fliers are a dime a dozen in Mexico... This won't be new for me!
Alberto threw his arms behind his head, as another servant stood next to him to beat some air on his face with a golden fan... His feet returned to the top of the table.
Alberto del Rio: Evan Bourne might think he stands a chance because he has been doing well as of late... He thinks he is on his way to. "The path to glory" Now I'll let you in on a little secret... The path to glory championship is a fraud... And a joke. Being the honest man I am, I feel forced to tell you the truth... There is only one path to glory... And that path consists on the footsteps I leave behind everyday... Whoever invented the Path To Glory should tell Ted DiBiase and Evan Bourne they have been walking in circles for far too long!
A mocking laughter was heard.
Ricardo Rodriguez: Mendigos Burros! (Poor Donkeys!)
Alberto del Rio: Evan, nothing personal against you... You're not even worth of holding a grudge against. As a man of honor, let me give you advice on how to overcome the inevitable fate of losing to me.
He chuckled a little and shrugged.
Alberto del Rio: It is just the type of man I am! Evan, you have been here for months now and you have done nothing to get noticed... A minor title reign which lasted like a week... An unsuccessful attempt at the PTG Championship... I would say your biggest achievement so far was bedding Maria? Although Punk beat you for a couple of years...
Alberto smiled into the camera.
Alberto del Rio: Evan, you are still in time to quit. Stop boring us with your matches, stop making us listen to your irrelevant thoughts, stop trying to impress us with the overly done aerial moves... Burger King, Taco Bell pr McDonald's would be more than happy to have you there... Once I lock the cross armbreaker it will be all over! You'll just have to tap to end the suffering! I'll be merciful if you tap quickly... I could try and NOT break your arm... But you can still flip burgers with your other hand an arm eh? See you on Sunday... PERRO.
Alberto smiled and laid back, Eve clapped as the scene faded to the EBWF.Net logo.
